Chapter 142 Settlements
Ah, I was a bit nervous today. More accurately speaking, the melancholy in my heart was weighing my body down.
After all, today was the day that I was confronting Dawson again.
He had been embroiled in an incident related to my family’s territory, so we couldn’t just let him go like that.
I didn’t really care much for Dawson himself, but I couldn’t afford to offend the Kataberia family. It would affect our family’s standing in noble society.
That’s why we had to invite him into our home.
Of course Tanya, Ryle, and a recovered Dida were all by my side.
Everything had just ended yesterday, and I was still worried about Dida. But he seemed to have returned to his usual flippant attitude.
In Tanya’s words, Dida had already adjusted his mental state again.
Before I knew it, Dawson was at the door.
I sat up straight quickly and arranged for him to enter the room. Before long, he was led into the room.
Perhaps because he was still in the middle of a journey, Dawson was dressed much more simply than usual. His expression was also quite calm.
“It’s been a long time, Sir Dawson. Please don’t be so formal.”
I saluted him before sitting down again.
“Well then. What brings you to my territory this time?”
I threw him my question as I sipped on the tea Tanya had prepared for me.
“To understand you.”
What a tangent from the answer I was expecting. I didn’t really know how to respond.
“I didn’t know anything about you at all, but I called you out just based on rumors. Although it’s perhaps too late for remorse, I can’t help but wonder if I did the right thing…I’ve developed doubt for my decisiveness back then. So this time I came to your territory and walked around, trying to learn about you.”
“What a flashback to the past, hm?”
I couldn’t help but retort.
What he was saying was still completely illogical.
He wanted to understand me and tried to find more out about me by talking to others, which meant that he was just basing his new judgements on more rumors.
Plus, a solution like that wouldn’t bring him accurate results anyways.
After all that had happened I no longer wanted an apology from him or anything.
If anything, the fact that he was creeping around near me only made me unhappy.
Dawson didn’t get angry at my testy response.
Ah, if it were back then he would undoubtedly react like that.
“You want to understand me so you can see if you were wrong. Well then, what if you find out that you were?”
“I…I don’t know yet.”
“All of this is completely out of order, then.”
I could only sigh at his response.
“In the beginning I was planning on apologizing.”
“Ah, so you thought at first that you had made the wrong decision. But after this visit, you decided that you were right in the beginning?”
“No. Even if I apologized, it wouldn’t serve any use. I can’t change the fact that I hurt you, or bring you back to the academy, or renew your engagement to Prince Edward.”
“You’re very self-aware now. If you’re here to apologize, I’m going to ask you to leave now…and correct you. I’m not weak enough that you are capable of hurting me. And at the moment, I’m not interested in restoring my relationship with the prince.”
“By hurting you, I meant restricting your freedom.”
“Let me restate my claim. No matter in terms of heart or body, I’m not weak enough that you are capable of hurting me.”
I said this bluntly.
If he tried to take responsibility for hurting me then we’d be in a lot more trouble.
“Just as you said, there’s nothing you can do for me. I have no demands for you, after all. Plus, you knew that my territory’s eastern region was unstable, yet you still ran over to interfere.”
“I just wanted to try and help as best I could.”
“All you did was cause trouble for me.”
My smiling, direct response made Dawon’s jaw drop in shock.
“You are a knight. But before that you are the son of the Kataberia family. If something had happened to you, how would I face your family? To much of the outside world, you and I are already at odds because of our past. If something happened to you, I only fear that the outside would spread rumors that I killed you because of a personal grudge!”
Hah…I couldn’t help but sigh again.
When talking with him, how much had I already sighed!
“You haven’t changed at all. It’s great to have a sense of justice, but everything you’re trying to do is for your own sake. Just for your own sense of justice you keep causing trouble for everyone else. In the end, you just create more issues for everyone around you, but you can’t even be responsible for your own actions. It’s like you’re a child trying to play hero.”
“Something like that…”
“Can you say for sure that it’s not true? The trouble that you’ve caused for me is the best proof. Even if you admit your mistake now, just as you say, I can’t return to the academy, and the relationships between our families can’t be mended so easily. What you can do is confront your own actions and the consequences that they brought.”
Dawson was silent.
“The time for dreaming like a child is over. All in all, don’t get involved with me any longer. If you understand what I’m saying, then stop stealthily investigating in nearby areas. Leave my territory as quickly as you can!”
Finishing my forthright rant, I closed the fan in my hand.
This was probably the first time since negotiating that I could actually smile a genuine smile.
The best smile of today!