85 Part 2
“All right,” Su Yu put down his juice, his eyes bright and words coming quickly out of his mouth. “I’ve already worked hard to come up with a plan for your legs. Since you’ve lost sensation for a while, it does need more effort and time. But I can promise to heal your legs. Please believe me in this!”
Song Yiming’s gaze landed on Su Yu again. It was a moment before he slowly pronounced the words, “I trust you.”
Compared to trusting this man, what Song Yiming really trusted was his own gut.
He never trusted others. Since he could remember, he was disgusted with, annoyed about everything around him. This caused his personality to be extreme and withdrawn, so that he was negative most of the time.
When he lost feeling in his legs at twenty-five, this became even worse. He even became violent in his moods, switching between joy and anger within a moment’s notice.
Although he wasn’t willing to admit it, it was true that he had difficulty controlling his own emotions sometimes. He hated the feeling, but didn’t want to suppress these feelings consuming him. His world was gray, after all. Whether he hurt others or himself, wasn’t it all the same?
No one knew that Song Yiming, who was viewed as a devil, had hurt himself before more than once.
He was hard on others but hard on himself too. More than once he caught himself thinking: was there a difference between being alive and being dead at all?
But there did seem to be a difference. Even if he couldn’t find what it was, some part deep inside of him kept reminding him. He needed to keep living.
These nonsensical thoughts were tragic and worthy of mockery. But he was still alive now, and the thoughts suppressed in his mind still existed.
He thought they’d be buried underneath a thick layer of dust, so much so that even he wouldn’t remember. But when he picked up that unexpected phone call, heard that smiling voice, it felt like a gust of wind swept through the bottom of his soul, uncovering something he didn’t even know existed within him, helping him recall the emotions he thought he hated.
Thank god I’m still alive. When the voice rang out, his brain was blank. In those seconds, this was the sentence that came to him.
“Mr. Song?” Su Yu waited for a while longer to no response from his lover. He extended a hand and waved it before him.
Waking up from his thoughts, Song Yiming’s right hand shot out instinctively, grabbing the hand shaking around in front of him. Although he immediately realized that this was an unusual move for him, when he felt the warmth of the hand in his, he wasn’t willing to let go. “What did you just say?”
“Nothing, just explained my treatment plan.” Su Yu let him hold his hand, leaning closer. “I think with your current state, you should be receiving both internal and external treatment for the best effect.”
“Internal and external?” Although it was a serious discussion, Song Yiming’s eyes wrapped around Su Yu, coiling around him like a swirl. His emotions didn’t come out often, but the moment they emerged they were impossible to repress.
“Yes. This means taking medicine plus massaging.” Su Yu of course noticed his intense gaze, but decided to pretend like he didn’t notice anything was off, instead pressing down on Song Yiming’s leg with a serious attitude. “Your legs haven’t moved in too long, so if you intend to recover you’ll need them massaged everyday. Don’t worry, I’m quite the expert at this.”
After a bit of massaging, he’d probably be able to stand up with no problem. Su Yu wasn’t thinking about just his legs standing up right now.
“All right.” Song Yiming nodded. There was a bittersweet feeling flickering through his mind, but he still didn’t understand why he was treating this person so differently. If it were him, no matter what he said he would probably agree to.
When you encounter the only salvation in your life, even if it’s toxic, you’ll drink it down like honey.
Su Yu immediately grinned, asking quickly, “Then let’s start now.”
Song Yiming didn’t expect things to progress so quickly. He thought there would at least be some preparation. But since he’d made up his mind already, when he actually started didn’t seem to matter as much. And for some reason hearing those words made his heart flutter again.
“All right, let’s start now.” Song Yiming’s hands tightened around the wheelchair, his expression calm while his heart felt like it was about to leap out of his chest.
And because of that, when Su Yu drew his hands back quickly and shoved them underneath his armpits, lifting him up, Song Yiming was completely caught off-guard. When he recovered, he heard Su Yu’s voice in his ear, warm with breath, “I’ve got you in my arms now, Mr. Song. Now let’s take your pants off.”