Botsuraku Youtei

Volume 4 Chapter 17

“It’s because you were doing those weird things that I misunderstood, Aniki.”


“Sorry, sorry.”


I safely made it into the castle but it seems that Rahsa is still a little mad.

The guards were silently whispering ‘That is the first time I have seen Rahsa-sama get so angry’ so I guess it is quite an unusual sight.

After getting to know the truth, Rahsa has been feeling awkward. Sorry~


“Putting that aside, thank you very much for coming. I am truly very happy you actually came. During your time here, I, Rahsa Kudan, promise to not let you feel any discomfort.”


“Thank you for that. But don’t be too tense now. After all, I just came to hangout at a friend’s house.”


“Ah, that is right. Then, please, think of this place as your own home while you spend your time here. Really, it is completely fine even if you laze around all day on the sofa.”


Yeah, I am probably not going to do that though.

Even at my home, I only do it about once a month.


Rahsa guided me into the guest room.

The quarters in which the royalties live in lie on the opposite side of the castle.


The room I was guided into was too luxurious to be called just the ‘guest room’.

it was big, it had high class furniture all around the room, and it had 4 to 5 expensive-looking pictures hanging on the walls. It was even several times bigger than the largest room at my place.

The structure of the room was really calming but I relaxed so much that on the contrary, I couldn’t relax at all. I no longer even understand my own feelings properly. Rather, who is this room for, really? Unless they’re royalties of another country, I can’t imagine anyone being able to relax here.


“This is the room we let the royalties of other countries use when they pay a visit.”


It was really for royalties then?!

Ah, this is impossible. There’s no way I can stay here.


“A bit more, you know, cosy-ish compact rooms would be nice, I think~. This one is so vast I can’t quite get accustomed to it.”


“Ah, is that so? I had kept this room since you might be coming for winter break but…. For some reason elder brother also desperately wanted this room but I pushed through and didn’t let him have it, you know? But, if you would prefer somewhere else, it is a shame but let’s go to another room then.”


Don’t tell me prince Arch wanted Iris to use this room?!

Where did the whole ‘employee’ plan go?!


“It pains me to offer this but, how about it? We prepare this room when landlords visit. It is quite inferior to the previous one but….”


It is more than enough though? In fact, that is quite exactly my position here though?

It is more confined than the previous one but far more comfortable. The one before not only was huge in size, its ceiling was also really high which kinda made it feel less like a room. This one is quite big and actually somewhat matches the rooms of my own house. When I looked at the furniture one by one, I did notice there were differences but I don’t really have much knowledge of them anyway so it did not bother me.


“Thank you. Then I will choose this one, it’s a nice room.”


“Ah, but I still can’t have you feel any sort of discomfort, Aniki. If you need anything at all, just ring the calling bell over there and someone of the castle will definitely come.”


That’s too convenient. I wonder if it will be okay if I use it in the middle of the night when I feel a little hungry? To make me a small late-night snack.

They won’t scold me like ‘You will get fat!’ or ‘Why at a time like this?’ right?


“By the way, did you come alone, Aniki? I surely thought you would have Iris-san with you.”


“Like you thought, I did come with Iris but she was taken away by your wonderful big brother.”


“Haaa, then that was why he was panicking so much when he had come back. Don’t tell me he was trying to prepare that room for Iris-san too?! Impossible! There’s no way Iris-san would want to use it….”


Fufu, so you have realized, Rahsa. Your elder brother is stupid. He is usually sharp but, as soon as it turns to something related to love, he turns into an idiot. That’s the true nature of your brother.


“It would be fine if he doesn’t do anything weird…. I shall look into it later. More importantly, Aniki, you should rest to soothe your travel fatigue. I have already prepared the bath for you.”


“A bath, eh? I am grateful.”


The arrangements I saw since I have entered the castle were amazing. As expected of Rahsa.

I thankfully chose to take him up on his offer.

The sun had not yet sunk.

It does feel a bit early for a bath but since I am also quite dirty, I think it would be better to take one right now.

Rahsa went to see how Iris was doing so an attendant guided me to the bath.

I wonder exactly where she was hiding since she immediately appeared after Rahsa called.

Could they be using the Anywhere Door?


“Kururi-sama, Rahsa-sama has instructed me to prepare this bathhouse for you. Shall I wash the clothes you are wearing? If you have any preference of clothing, I can arrange that.”


“Then, please wash it. And about the substitute clothing, something easy to move in, please.”


“Yes, I will be at it then.”



After having that conversation, the attendant disappeared. She might have used the Anywhere Door.

After taking off my clothes in the changing room, I went into the bath with a towel on my shoulder.




Well, this is one huge bathhouse.

Is it something a like a large public bath, I wonder. So that everyone working at the castle could use it. I kinda feel it is too luxurious for that but it is the royal castle so this just might be the standard here.

This is the first time I saw one of those naked woman statues holding a pot with water flowing from it. As expected of the royal castle, too good!


It did seem to be a little too early so I was the only one in the bath.

I can keep it all to myself until someone comes. This is the best.


I washed my body before getting into the hot bath.

There were so many brands of shampoos that I didn’t understand which one to use. I worked quite a bit of sweat so I tried to use 2-3 brands.

All of them had a strong fragrance. Moreover, my hair became very silky.

My cuticles haven’t had the best treatment all these time so I guess I will give them plenty of shampoo now.


While I was scrubbing my head hard with the shampoo, I could hear the sound of someone’s footsteps.

It seems like the 2nd visitor has arrived. I guess this is it of keeping the bath to myself.

I was planning to apply soap all over my body and slide from one side of the bath to the other if no one came but, it is a shame.


“Oya? It is quite rare for someone to be here before me…. A red haired guest, eh…?”


Since I have been spoken to, I forced myself to look. A man in his prime was standing there.

I would have liked to not have been spoken to since I have foam on my eyes but, I decided to reply to not be rude.


“Ah, hello. I took the privilege of entering the bath first.”


“I see. It has been quite long since someone has entered before me.”


“Ah, is that so? I am sorry then.”


“No need to be so upright. A bath is something everyone would use.”


“I see.”



What is this old man talking about?

‘Quite long since someone entered before me’? What happened to your job?! I wonder if he’s considerably free.

I guess there are people like that in the royal castle as well.


He looks quite good. Seems like one of those ‘good men’.

Blonde hair, well-featured face with a few wrinkles and a nice mustache.


A guy from a decent family, somehow getting a job in royal castle but being incompetent, he causes problems to the surrounding. But, as he looks good, one way or the other, he gets helped by the women and lives his life.

I passed my judgement on the old guy. Sorry if it is wrong.


“The foam will get into your eyes. Slowly clean them.”


“Ah, yes.”


I was planning on doing just that even without you telling me. He was standing beside me wearing a gentle smile. What is this person? He looks good but he is kinda creepy.


“This shampoo is pretty good, is it not? I chose it.”


“Ah, is that so?”


Not only being incompetent at his job, he also butts in to bath matters? Quite the bothersome, old man.


“Use it to your heart’s content. The body soap is quite good too. I chose that as well.”


You’re butting in too much, old man!!

The bath management is probably being done by a commoner so I ended up feeling pity for him.

Even if he’s an incompetent noble, a commoner can’t say much to him.

But still, the old man’s choice isn’t bad. It is certainly a pretty good shampoo.


“I see you are done cleaning your hair. How about it? Shall I wash your back?”


Old man, it is okay if you just let me be….


“……Yes, please.”


But, I would still like it so I will gladly accept.



Using his favourite soap luxuriously, he cleaned my back.

It is a little creepy how eager he is about this though.


“Ah, after you’re done washing my back, please let me wash yours. Oh and just normal cleaning will do. It’s always like that after all.”


“Now, there’s no need to be impatient. Not like anybody will come anytime soon.”


Eh, will nobody come for a while then? The castle’s job seems to be quite hectic. Although this old man seems to have all the time in the world.


“Did you come to the castle for a job?”


“Ah, no, I came to meet a friend. And so he told me to stay for a while, which I am grateful for.”


“I see. Make yourself at home.”


Is it just me or is this old man quite pompous?

He talks as if he owns the castle.

I wonder if he’s actually at a high position here.

If that’s the case, then this old man is an earnest, competent, old man. I am sorry, I will revise my judgement.


“When will the other people start coming in, sir?”


“Nn, well, no one will come in for at least an hour.”


“Ah, really? Then I guess it will be fine if I take my time.”


“Yeah. It is rare so, you could also cover yourself with soap and slide from one side to another.”

Old maaaannnn!!! Why are you thinking of the same things as me?!!

For someone as old as you, I would normally think you stopped thinking about stuff like that.


“Haha, surely you jest.”


“It is no joke. There are no people here at this time so I do it when stress piles up.”


“What do you do?!?…… Well, I did think of doing the same thing just a while ago.”


“I see! Then we have no choice but to do it!”


We have no choice?! It is okay to not do it too, right?! Right?!



“Now that it’s settled, red-haired boy, quickly clean my back as well.”


“Understood. Forgive me if I sound a bit rude but, while sliding like that might be barely permissible for my age, it probably quite isn’t for yours.”


“It is okay. Nobody will come for a while anyway. If you just don’t say anything, it will not enter anyone’s ear. If it gets leaked, then it will be you.”


“I won’t say anything. I am also doing it after all.”


While calming the old man as he went ‘Quick, quick!’, I finished cleaning his back. Old man, you are looking too forward to this!

After having his back cleaned, the old man went to a corner of the bath without covering his body with soap.

He isn’t even soaked in soap. No matter how slippery the bath may be, in that condition you will just get your skin damaged.


Then the old man went on and touched the wall somewhere, making a click noise.

Then he took a tile off, revealing a space with various stuff in it like sake.

“My wife has forbidden me from drinking so when I want to drink, I come here.”


This old man is no good.


“Here, I also have my favourite soap. It is a cheap one being sold at the city but, as far as I have tested, this one is the easiest to slide with.”


No good, this old man really is no good. Using the castle facilities for his own purpose. Even for something not good.


“Tested, you say… how long have you been doing this?”


“Well, that is of course since I was as old as you. Strangely enough, I wasn’t that interested as a child.”


I didn’t ask about all that. I wasn’t even asking, I was just baffled! I don’t want to hear stories from your youth!


“Listen well, this is a word of advice from your senpai.”




“Don’t use a low amount thinking it a waste, okay? Your stomach will wear out. You won’t be able to show your stomach in front of women for a while. It’s cheap anyway so use it as much as you want.”


I feel stupid for raising my expectations..

I wonder if he had such experiences before….


“Alright, it looks like you have thoroughly soaked yourself. Next, we also spill it on our course. If these are not soaked you might also cut your stomach. It hurts quite a lot.”


“How serious are you about this?!! The people coming afterwards will slip and hurt their head!”


“Don’t mind that. Listen, you can do a curve but I would advise not to since you’re a beginner. For today, let’s do a straight line.”


“I just wanted to lightly play around a little….”


“Now, you also make your course. I will use mine, after all.”


Together with the old man, we spilled soap all over the bath naked.

……. What am I doing? Really…. what am I doing? I won’t be able to show my face anymore if someone sees this.



“Course, done. Body, done. Fufufu, now, let’s go!”


Together with the old man, I went to one edge of the bath and got ready. Far ahead of me, I could see the other end. It would at least be 50 meters.

It made me think again, how humongous and luxurious this bath is. The people living in the castle can live such a wonderful life.


“Kick the wall properly, okay? Half-assed kicks won’t get you to the other side.”


“You too, old man. Just so you know, I have got it perfectly simulated on my mind.”


I ended up blurting old man but I guess it’s okay. We are kinda like comrades now anyway.


“Another advice, picture a penguin. Decrease the parts touching with the floor as much as you can. It will be a test of strength.”


What is this old man explaining to me all naked?

Try bending your back muscles like this, you will look like a complete pervert.

I already kinda feel it is too late though….



‘1, 2, 3 and go!!’ saying that, we both kicked the wall with all we had.


I thought my kick was stronger but soon the old man went on ahead.

I didn’t bend my back and put only a part of stomach on the floor like the old man had advised.

But on the spur of the moment, I also threw away embarrassment and mimicked that form.

I kept on steadily accelerating. It seems like the old man’s form theory was perfect.


The other edge slowly became clear. It became clear but….

Hmm? Wait, I am not decelerating?!!




I was spreading my arms like a penguin so I couldn’t protect my head either. I directly hit the wall with my head.

It felt like my head would split open, my neck will break, and it hurts! What is this?! Old man, I reached the edge quite easily!



“Kaahh!! Ouccchhh!!”


When I looked at the old man, he was also writhing in pain holding his head.

He is stupid. I forgot that this old man was stupid.


Damn, if I did more simply I could had more fun too.

Being hooked in by the old man, I ended up doing it too well.


“So, how is it? Are you liking the royal castle?”


“No, I can’t just go like ‘Ah, yes it is pretty nice, isn’t it?’ when you ask at a timing like this.”


“I guess that’s true.”



After hurting my head with the old man, we entered the bath.

He also brought out his hidden sake.

I didn’t really want to drink it but it is quite expensive so I decided on having one sip.


“Ah, delicious.”


“Right? Nahhaha, I understand you’re still young. Here, I will pour you some, so drink more.”


“Oh, thank you.”


And like this, we kept drinking in the hot bath till we became like boiled octopuses.

It was the moment I had made a good friend in crime.


He said to tell him if something troubled me in the royal castle but I honestly don’t feel like asking him…. I will again be swallowed up in something weird.

Well, we could do it again at the bath. The sake was delicious too.







Proofreader: Ranthe

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