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245 Prayer

With an emotion similar to a prayer, I opened the document.

Organizing funding, and the material resources, transportation, and supplies each location required.

Although it didn’t seem like much on paper, to do all these things I needed to take the whole picture into consideration, predicting various possibilities, and construct counterstrategies to each.

In other words, me and the rest of the officials had no time to rest. But none of us backed down from that.

Our operations were what held the movement of our troops together.

More importantly, our people were all fighting with all their strength.

And that’s why we could never back down.

Basically there was even more to worry about than expected, and even less time to rest than estimated.

Were those on the frontline still safe?

I couldn’t stop imagining what the people who chose to remain in their cities were doing, battling it out with the enemies.

The more I thought about it, the more I couldn’t help but feel negatively about the whole situation.

Endless worry, unrest filled my heart.

I couldn’t allow myself to be overwhelmed.

Even though I promised this, it seemed like the future was going dark. I felt an incredible fear surging inside of me.

As if the slightest relaxation was enough for negative emotions to seize my throat, pulling me under.

I kept thinking of matters I needed to handle coolly, and began to construct corresponding strategies.

On the other hand, my heart had no place to rest.

Walking on a path too dark to see the future, where I had the fates of my people in my hand, made it impossible to step forward with any kind of confidence.

If I could stuff my ears, close my eyes, and just sit here within my own bubble, I’d be so happy.

Whenever the thought crossed my mind, I’d recall everything I had been through to get here.

It wasn’t a peaceful road by any means, nor even overwhelmingly happy.

Stagnation, worries, tears, rage.

For that reason, what happiness I could experience was even more resplendent than usual.

If I gave up where I stood, everything I’d fought for would be worthless.

Those thoughts propelled me forward.

My head was buried in documents. Every once in a while, I’d raise my gaze to the sky as if in prayer.

Praying for everyone to be all right.

Praying for peace once again.

Although I didn’t know who I was praying to, I couldn’t help but pray regardless.

“Excuse me! Milady…”

Tanya burst through the door.

“What is it, Tanya?”

“They’ve succeeded at defeating the Acacia Kingdom’s attack and captured the first prince alongside many others. The Boltique family has also succeeded at winning back the government offices.”

My brain went blank. When I came back to my senses, I was already on the verge of falling over.

“Milady!”

Running over quickly, Tanya supported me.

The warmth of her hands and the impact against my body told me this wasn’t a dream.

Even while my lungs kept breathing out air, my field of vision was beginning to blur.

“This is amazing news…”

“It really is. Milady, thank you for your hard work.”

Tanya’s gentle smile only made my field of vision go even more wobbly.

“Thank you, Tanya.”

Putting my hand on the table, I pushed myself up.

“I’m endlessly thankful for everyone who has followed me to this point, and the people of this land.”

The words I whispered made Tanya’s face flush red with joy.

“We need to decide where to house the captives. And there’s more cleanup work to be done.”

Everything we needed to deal with now was coming to my mind.

“Perhaps we should just rest for today, milady.”

Tanya seemed troubled by my attitude.

“What are you saying, Tanya. We need to share these joyous feelings with everyone else. We’ll wait for them…the heroes who protected our land to return to celebrate. At the same time, we must pray for the lives lost.”

When I told her these feelings, she finally seemed to understand and responded to me with a smile and nod.